You didn't raise $5M to argue with Comcast or compare SOC2 vendors. We are the 24/7 Ops Team that eliminates the 97% of work you hate.
Most early-stage founders make the same fatal mistake:
They hire "good enough" operators because A-players cost $200k+.
Elysium flips the script. We give you the best possible operator for every task—the person who’s actually elite at that domain—without the $200k commitment.
It’s not about being cheaper (though we are). It’s about unfair leverage.
While you are putting out fires, your competitor is shipping. We are the digital underworld that makes you look like you have your life together.
In 2010, startups bought servers. In 2024, they use AWS.
In 2024, you are still hiring "Ops Managers." Stop it.
You make 50 decisions a day. Only 3 move the needle. The rest is noise. Every hour you spend booking a flight is an hour you aren't shipping product.
Your time is worth $500/hour. Doing your own research on office furniture isn't "lean." It's burning investor cash.
A Chief of Staff takes 3 months to hire and costs $180k + equity. We start today. For less than the price of lunch.
We aren't an app. We are real humans, experts in their fields, working in the shadows to make you look like a god.
We fight for every dollar. Leases, SaaS contracts, vendor agreements. We get 3 quotes minimum. We read the fine print so you don't have to.
Flights. Hotels. Offsites. We don't just book; we curate. You just show up at the airport.
"Find the best CRM." "Who is the best immigration lawyer in SF?" "List of top 50 VC firms." Done.
Send gifts to clients. Coordinate office moves. Stock the fridge. If it happens in the real world, we handle it.
No meetings. No "circling back." You text us. We execute. You get a notification when it's done.
Text, Email, or Slack. "Book flights to NY for the whole team next Tuesday."
Our specialists handle quotes, booking, and calendar invites.
You get a confirmation. Total time spent by you: 12 seconds.
On it. I've found 2 options that fit the budget and dates:
Tap one to book instantly.
These aren't chores. These are burn-rate killers. Drag them into the void and watch them disappear forever.
Your accountant will cry tears of joy.
| Feature | Elysium | Chief of Staff |
|---|---|---|
| Annual Cost | $17,988 | $180,000 + Equity |
| Time to First Win | Day 1 (Today) | Month 4 (After hiring) |
| Talent Pool | Global Network of 10+ Experts | 1 Person (Who gets sick) |
| Management Required | Zero (API-like) | Weekly 1:1s, Career Planning |
| Availability | 24/7/365 | 9-5 (Mon-Fri) |
We know you've been burned by promises before.
So here is the deal: Give us one task. The one you've been dreading all week.
We do the task. If the result isn't specifically "mind-blowing," you don't pay a dime. You ghost us. We vanish. No awkward "break up" call required.
Cheaper than a Chief of Staff. Faster than hiring.
For the skeptic
The sweet spot
Series A+
Calling us a VA is like calling a Ferrari a station wagon. Technically, they both drive, but one gets you there faster and people look at you differently. VAs execute tasks. We execute outcomes. We don't just "book a flight"; we handle the preferences, the logistics, and the hotel negotiation.
Yes. AI does the grunt work (searching, sorting, drafting). A hyper-competent human with taste does the final mile (deciding, refining, sending). You get the speed of a robot with the social intelligence of a Chief of Staff.
Then we break up. It’s not a marriage; it’s a subscription. You cancel, we vanish. No tears, no alimony, no awkward exit interviews. We just stop billing you. Instantly.
We operate in the shadows. Discretion isn't a feature; it's the product. We use bank-level encryption, and NDAs are our love language. We work with founders who are paranoid for a living.